Termites: They're Eating Your House and Dropping Wings in Your Drink
They're Eating Your House Right NowSomewhere in New Orleans, at this very moment, a colony of Formosan subterranean termites is quietly consuming someone's home. They don't knock. They don't announ...
The Krewe of Chad: The Dude-Brah Motley Krewe Claiming Your Neutral Ground
They Came, They Claimed, They Spray-PaintedEvery Mardi Gras season and Jazz Fest weekend, a familiar pest emerges from the suburban hinterlands and descends upon the neutral grounds of New Orleans:...
Wasps: The Official Jerks of the New Orleans Insect World
The Jerks of the Insect WorldWasps have earned their reputation as the jerks of the insect world, and in New Orleans — where warm weather, abundant vegetation, and old wooden houses create wasp par...
Bachelorette Parties: They Travel in Packs and They Are Here for the Best Night Ever
They Travel in PacksYou will hear them before you see them. The shriek of coordinated excitement, the click of matching heels on cobblestone, the chant of a name — usually "Brittany" or "Jessica" o...
Litterers: Tarnishing the Beauty of New Orleans One Wrapper at a Time
Tarnishing the Beauty One Wrapper at a TimeNew Orleans is one of the most beautiful cities in America. The live oaks arch over the avenues like cathedral ceilings. The shotgun houses line up in row...
Scammers: I Bet I Know Where You Got Your Shoes
I Bet I Know Where You Got Your ShoesYou will hear the line before you see the person delivering it. You will be walking down Bourbon Street or through Jackson Square or along Decatur, minding your...
Swamp Ass: The Not-So-Pleasant Consequence of New Orleans' Climate
The Condition That Binds UsThere are things about living in New Orleans that the tourism board does not put on the brochure. The potholes, sure. The crime, occasionally. But swamp ass? Never. And y...
Weed Rats: Most Often Found in the NOPD Evidence Room
Most Often Found in the Evidence RoomEvery city has its unique wildlife. New Orleans has the weed rat — a creature most commonly spotted not in the swamps or the gutters but in the NOPD evidence ro...
Entergy: Keeping the Crescent City Powered, Most of the Time
Keeping the Lights On, Most of the TimeEntergy New Orleans is the utility company that provides electricity to the Crescent City, and it does so with the consistency of a jazz musician who shows up...
Flood Insurance: The Most Expensive Piece of Paper in Your Filing Cabinet
The Most Expensive Piece of Paper in Your Filing CabinetOwning a home in New Orleans means accepting certain truths. The foundation will shift. The plumbing will be mysterious. And every year, you ...
Hurricanes: The Powerful Named Storms That Test This City Every Year
They Have NamesThat is the thing about hurricanes that separates them from every other pest on this list. They get names. And in New Orleans, those names carry weight the way saints' names carry we...
Mosquitos: The Unofficial State Bird of Louisiana
The Unofficial State BirdIf New Orleans had an honest tourism campaign, it would include an asterisk. Come for the music, the food, the culture — and bring bug spray, because the mosquitos here are...
Salt Water Intrusion: The Gulf of Mexico Is Slowly Coming for Your Drinking Water
The Gulf Is Coming UpriverOf all the pests that plague New Orleans, this one does not buzz, bite, or steal your packages. It creeps. Slowly, invisibly, and with the patience of geology, salt water ...
The Political Machine: Deep-Rooted Networks Powered by Money and Gatekeepers
Deep Roots, Long MemoriesIn most American cities, politics is a profession. In New Orleans, it is a family business. The political machine that has powered this city for generations is not a single...
City Hall: Take a Number, Wait, Wonder, Stare, Hope, Pray, Pay
Take a NumberThere are certain inevitabilities in New Orleans life. You will sweat through your shirt in July. You will argue about the best po-boy. And at some point, no matter how long you have a...
The College Kids: Every August They Return for a Bourbon Street Education
Every August, They ReturnYou can set your calendar by it. Somewhere around the second week of August, before the heat has even thought about breaking, the migration begins. SUVs with out-of-state p...
Construction: Always Under Construction, Never Quite Finished
Always Under Construction, Never Quite FinishedIn New Orleans, our foundations are always having to be rebuilt. Improvements to drain the rain water and to keep us from sinking are constant. The ci...
Drunks: Loud, Obnoxious, and Thinking the World Is Their Urinal
Loud, Obnoxious, and Leavin' a MessIn a city with no last call, go-cups on every corner, and a Bourbon Street that operates as a 24-hour open-air bar, drunks are not a bug in the system — they are ...
The Heat: It Smothers Everything and Everyone in New Orleans
It Smothers EverythingIf humidity is New Orleans' most brutal unifier, the heat is its enforcer. The heat smothers any chance of outdoor activity from June through September. It pairs with humidity...
No Left Turns: The Three Most Frustrating Words in New Orleans Driving
The Three Most Frustrating Words in New OrleansNo Left Turn. Three words that are seen at nearly every intersection while driving down the likes of Canal and Broad Streets. Three words that confoun...
